Canonically dubious: Vee

"Purpose of visit?" asked the security guard outside the TV Titan's hangar.

"I'm to deliver an item to engineer Sixteen-Sixty-Eight," replied the TV-unit ahead of Vee.

"Make that two of us," said Vee, holding up a package that looked very similar to the one being carried by the other TV.

Vee was not displeased to have been called to the Titan's hangar, but was a little surprised that someone of his calibre was being asked to essentially be a courier. It felt like a waste of his skills. At least he wasn't alone in this duty.

The two TVs didn't need to announce their serial numbers to the security guard or to each other; their proximity enabled them to perceive each other's yes-I-live signal, containing their serials and other official designations. Ah. The other TV was Fifty-Twenty-Two, officially a diplomat to the other two factions, and well known to be in disgrace as a field agent. Vee wondered if this menial job was a punishment for Twenty-Two - and if so, what had he done to earn the same?

Vee and Twenty-Two signed themselves into the Titan hangar, and accepted the visitor passes handed to them by the security guard (clipping them onto their lapels). As the hangar bulkhead doors opened, the two TVs entered the hangar side by side. They nodded to each other in greeting.

"I like your chevron," said Twenty-Two. "Very chic. Oh - your serial ends in 5. So that's a numeral V?"

"Thank you. It is indeed," replied Vee. "In fact, that's my nickname among friends."

"I have such a nickname myself. Some call me Cygnus."

"Like a swan? Why is that; do you hiss?" asked Vee.

"It's been known. It's actually for the Twenty-Two in my serial - a friend thought it looked like 'two little swans'."

Both TVs turned the corner to enter the main hangar space, and made their way along the network of walkways and gantries to where the engineers were currently clustered. The engineers were evidently mid-break: two of them were sparring on the main walkway at the Titan's head height, surrounded by the remainder of the crew spectating. The Titan itself observed the duel, evidently entertained by what it saw.

Vee and Cygnus approached the cluster of engineers, receiving and parsing the collection of yes-I-live signals, until they located the lead engineer, Sixteen-Sixty-Eight.

"Engineer Sixty-Eight-" began Vee.

"Oh, such ill timing," said the engineer. "This match was just getting good. Thank you for bringing these." Engineer Sixty-Eight accepted the offered packages from Vee and Cygnus, nodding to each TV in turn.

Vee and Cygnus watched the combatants to see what Sixty-Eight meant by the fight 'getting good'. …It might have been good by the engineers' standards, but the two agents (one current, one former) were underwhelmed. The engineers' steps shuffled rather than danced confidently, and their blade strikes were hesitant, almost shy. They'd be able to take out a surprised and unarmed skibidi, to be sure, but both Vee and Cygnus felt that a TV really ought to be able to do better than that. Vee noticed Cygnus's blades twitch and ever so slightly protrude, as if spoiling for a fight, before Cygnus reeled them back in. ("As a diplomat, you really should conceal your disdain better than that," thought Vee.)

Eventually, one of the engineers triumphed over the other, moving their blade in past the other TV's failed block. "Do you yield?" asked the victorious engineer.

"I yield," said the defeated one.

Both combatants stood and retracted their blades, before fist-bumping in recognition of each other's skills. The Titan punched one fist into its other hand's palm in appreciation (gently, to not overwhelm its tiny comrades with the sound).

"The Titan enjoys watching us spar," explained engineer Sixty-Eight to Vee and Cygnus.

"I do indeed," interjected the Titan. "It's something I can't participate in any more, but I can still enjoy vicariously."

"We've time for one more match before we really must get back to work," said Sixty-Eight.

"Could I play the winner?" asked Cygnus. Cygnus was evidently raring to show these nerds how it was done, Vee thought.

"Bring it on!" said the engineer who had won the previous match. "I was getting bored from the lack of challenge."

Cygnus and the engineer (Twenty-Four-Fifty-Six, specialising in the Titan's electrical systems, according to their yes-I-live signal) stepped forward from the ringed crowd into the fighting space. The two TVs performed the ritualised motion of 'introducing' their blades -- bringing them together until they were almost touching, then pulling them back slowly and smoothly -- before stepping back and assuming combat stance.

It was barely a contest - Cygnus all but danced rings around the electrical engineer, provoking a chorus of admiring static buzzes from all spectators. Even Vee was surprised by how caught up he found himself in watching the action.

"Do you yield?"< Cygnus inevitably asked.

"Gladly! I yield," replied the engineer, displaying an amused emoticon - evidently glad to have met their match.

"We'd better be on our way," said Vee to Cygnus, once the outcry of appreciative static noises had died down. "We shouldn't keep these engineers any longer."

"Oh, but Five, do you really not have time?" asked the Titan. "It's not often I get two agents in my hangar at the same time. I would like to see you and Twenty-Two spar."

Vee noticed Cygnus's screen light up with excited white noise. ("Oh, you don't know what you're getting into, do you?" thought Vee.) "Who am I to turn down a request from the Titan?" said Vee. "Twenty-Two, do you accept?"

"Absolutely," said Cygnus. "Let's duel."

The two TVs took their positions and deployed their blades to perform the ritual of 'introduction'. To Cygnus's surprise, Vee's blade emerged from the back of his wrist, rather than the inside.

"Oh - you have a uncommon type of blade housing," commented Cygnus. "I've never sparred with anyone with that model. I welcome the challenge."

The two TVs faced each other in combat stance, then began. Vee moved unhesitatingly, slicing through the air at Cygnus and pulling their blade just short of what would have been a debilitating blow in a real fight.

"You weren't ready, were you?" Vee graciously gave Cygnus an out.

"…No, I wasn't," replied Cygnus. (Vee slightly hoped the diplomat appreciated his action.)

"Well, now you're all warmed up," said Vee, returning to combat-ready stance. "Show me what you've got."

Cygnus fought hard and well, but Vee fought harder and better still, thrusting and parrying as though this was what he was born to do. The engineers watched in rapt delight, making static buzzes of appreciation often.

"Do you yield?" asked Vee, their blade held just short of the strike that would have ended a real fight.

"I yield," conceded Cygnus. "Beautifully fought, Five." Cygnus accepted Vee's offered hand to get back on their feet, and the two TVs shared a fist-bump.

"Maybe you could even take on Palindrome," said one of the engineers (Fifty-One-Seventy-Four, specialising in the Titan's coolant systems, according to their yes-I-live signal).

"Who or what is that?" asked Cygnus.

"That would be me," said another engineer. Their yes-I-live signal showed their serial to be Ninety-Seven-Seventy-Nine, making their nickname's meaning obvious.

"We mustn't keep you," said Vee. "Sixty-Eight already said there was time for one more match, and that was two matches ago."

"…I'll allow it," said Sixty-Eight. "We're ahead of schedule enough, and we rarely get to see Palindrome in action."

Both Vee and Cygnus wondered just how much of a challenge this Palindrome could be - the other engineers had seemed amateurish enough.

"Alright," said Palindrome. "I'm a busy engineer, so I'll spar both of you at the same time."

"That's…" Cygnus began, unsure how to finish the sentence.

"…Supremely confident of you," Vee finished.

"No, merely self-aware."

The three TVs performed the ritual of introduction - Vee and Cygnus both looking at Palindrome's blades to see if there was anything unusual about them that might give the engineer an advantage. Nothing that they could see.

Vee moved with precision and was shocked when Palindrome parried his move almost as hard as his initial attack. Cygnus had even less success, forced to go on the defensive and becoming less and less able to even try to get a hit in. Even with two against one, Palindrome ran rings around both agents.

"Do you yield?" asked Palindrome, a blade poised at both Vee and Cygnus.

"…I yield," Cygnus said.

"As do I," added Vee. "That was… certainly something." (The Titan clapped softly in appreciation.)

"Best of five?" suggested Palindrome. "I'll even give you two points each to start."

"I… think you've already made your point," said Cygnus.

"I quite agree," said Vee. "We've taken up a lot of your time as it is. But thank you very much for the opportunity."

The two visiting TVs said their goodbyes to the engineers and the Titan, before moving to exit the hangar. They wordlessly transmitted a question to each other - just what had that engineer Palindrome trained in before becoming an engineer?