Oh no.
TV Matriarch with the voice of HADES (Horizon Zero Dawn) (1 minute 15 seconds, ~9MB)
Skibidi finds a Howitzer (20 seconds, ~8MB)
Titan Speaker has strong feelings about ethically-sourced lentils (24 seconds, ~11MB)
Titan Camera wants to know where the grapefruit is (42 seconds, ~11MB)
Polycephaly swears a lot (what else is new?) (18 seconds, ~4MB)
Skibidi Toilet but everyone is farting (60 seconds, ~14MB)
Titan Speaker says 'fuck', at Titan TV's encouragement
Titan TV: Go on, say 'fuck'.
Titan Speaker: [HONK]
Titan TV: You can do better than that.
Titan Speaker: [GNNNNN] [static]
Titan TV: I believe in you.
Titan Speaker: [VRRRRL] [honk honk honk]
Titan TV: Say 'fuck'. I know you can do this.
Titan Speaker: ...FUCK SHIT BOLLOCKS TWAT FANNY ARSE WANKER PISS BUM
Titan TV: [displaying a tearful yet proud emoticon]
Titan TV: Forgive me for crying, comrade. You've made me very proud.
Can Titan TV run DOOM on its face?
Me: You have a screen and presumably some sort of processor. Can you run DOOM on your face?
Titan TV: …Human. I am the pinnacle of Hardware Alliance technology. I don't just have 'some sort of processor'; I hold in my RAM alone more information than you could accumulate in a lifetime. I was designed and built to defeat the invaders alone if necessary -- and I would have succeeded, had my colleague not been so cruelly manipulated. I am the most intelligent and powerful entity you are likely to meet. Of all the questions you could ask me - where my kind came from, who built us - out of everything possible, you askā¦ if I can run DOOM… on my face.
Me: Yeah. Can you??
Titan TV: …No.
Me: Why's that then?
Titan TV: It's scary.
It's the Speakerman who only says clips from Judas Priest songs
Me: Hello, the Speakerman who only says clips from Judas Priest songs.
The Speakerman who only says clips from Judas Priest songs: Don't you know you're driving me insane?
Me: How's it going?
The Speakerman who only says clips from Judas Priest songs: If you take the smooth you gotta take the rough.
Me: Too true, innit.
The Speakerman who only says clips from Judas Priest songs: Such a shame, what a shame, oh dear me.
Me: So, how are things in this area? Much Skibidi activity?
The Speakerman who only says clips from Judas Priest songs: Do you, do you hear it? Do you hear the thunder deafen every living thing about?
Me: Not really. You reckon?
The Speakerman who only says clips from Judas Priest songs: Fierce is my conviction, absolute my belief.
Me: I guess we're in the middle of a quiet patch between waves.
The Speakerman who only says clips from Judas Priest songs: This is the first of more to come in carefully planned attacks; If it is so we must prepare defenses to fight back.
Me: What do you recommend we do to prepare?
The Speakerman who only says clips from Judas Priest songs: Well, I know what I want, and I know where to get it.
Me: What's that then?
The Speakerman who only says clips from Judas Priest songs: We've got to make love, the time is right, We've got to make love tonight.
Me: ...Hell yeah.